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Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Hipokrit???

someone said to me

"I'm not sure this going to work, sorry. I don't want to be "hipokrit". are u angry??"

Angry??? Yes..

Deep in my heart said, why u choose to quit before u try?? why did u built it up just to watch it falls??? hipokrit atau tiada pendirian??

FYI, i know the difference. I know very well.......

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

I can't hate you anymore..............

An empty room can be so deafening
The silence makes you wanna scream
It drives you crazy
I chased away the shadows of your name
And burned the picture in a frame
But it couldn't save me

And how could we quit something we never even tried
Well you still can't tell me why

We built it up
To watch it fall
Like we meant nothing at all
I gave and gave the best of me
But couldn't give you what you need
You walked away
You stole my life
Just to find what you're looking for
But no matter how I try
I can't hate you anymore
...I can't hate you anymore

You're not the person that you used to be
The one I want who wanted me
And that's a shame but
There's only so many tears that you can cry
Before it drains the light right from your eyes
And I can't go on that way
And so I'm letting go of everything we were
It doesn't mean it doesn't hurt

We built it up
To watch it fall
Like we meant nothing at all
I gave and gave the best of me
But couldn't give you what you need
You walked away
You stole my life
Just to find what you're looking for
But no matter how I try
I can't hate you anymore

Sometimes you hold so tight
It slips right through your hands
Will I ever understand????

We built it up
To watch it fall
Like we meant nothing at all
I gave and gave the best of me
But couldn't give you what you need
You walked away
You stole my life
Just to find what you're looking for
But no matter how I try
I can't hate you anymore


p.s.: enough saying......

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

:(

It's hurting me.........bgus lagi x tahu daripada tahu......

bye 2010, welcome 2011







macam tidak percaya pula, 2011 is around the corner. what did i achieved? a lots actually. its all reflect my self-esteem. to me, i classify myself is successful, strong, and keras hati. true enough, my son is my only strength. rasanya klu tiada dia..lama suda ni terjun bangunan yayasan sabah..terjun laut...but Alhamdulillah, sy masih berpijak d bumi yg nyata. Buat apa mengenang kisah lalu, cinta yg tidak kesampaian, mahligai yg diharapkan tidak seindah yg diimpikan. Syukur alhamdulillah, walaupun dugaan getir melanda 2 tahun berturut-turut, kami 2 beranak, masih kuat meneruskan kehidupan. okay! enough with keluh kesah!

so, life must go on! he's happy with his life (more less, i dont care much!) i hope he will let me teruskan hidup. jgn ganggu kami lagi. u just dont deserve us.

hehe..just now, i download 1 application in FB, kinda like it. It list down all my status for 2010..bila baca balik, senyum sendiri...its like a story..hmmm...my self talk?? hehehe....

Thursday, December 16, 2010

what berry r u???

i recently bought a blackberry. ya lah, mau ikut peredaran zaman lah kononnya. before this, i'm very comfortable with my old phone. its so easy to do the 'multitasking' job (driving + sms'ing).hehehe. but the truth is, i kept telling myself that i cannot accept any technology advancement, in terms on mobile phone, any IT application (except for internet surfing, of course). but, yalah, i want to challenge myself lah....then here i am, using bb....but i dont have time to explore it yet. belum on pun lagi. biar la dulu. habis program guru tadika ni, baru lah mengaktifkan diri......dont ask me for the bbm pin. i do not know where to find it..heheh...


p/s: use skype, jelas, lancar and boleh mengeratkan ikatan...heheheh...

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

my "selftalk" for today.

suddenly, i dont know how i should route my mind. there are 15 checklist in my organizer today. i only managed to fulfill ONE. *AMBIL BAJU DARI LAUNDRY* > just because i dont have anything to wear 2moro. for the rest of the lists.....sorry....my bad. otak aku tiba2 "tepu".

For tomorrow, 6 new lists tiba-tiba muncul. So, its going to be 21 lists. huhuhu.....i'm going to have hot shower, pull my blanket, switch off my hp, and sleep. OMG, i need to go and buy pair of shoes. this high heels is killing me. i'm going to meet a few people tomorrow. i need to move fast. run here and there. Aduhh...kereta belum cuci. Ok, tomorrow, before going to sutera habour, i will go and buy a decent shoes. AND, collect my contact lense. The salesgirl keep calling me since last week..."aiyyaaa..miss, ur contact lense smpai suda owwhh" - fyi, my eyes are sensitive, they are only "compatible" to a few brand. Jadi, kadang2 tu terpaksa order. And i really need it right now, since the old one is stucked in my eye. errmmm, i'm not so sure whether terjatuh ataupun "ter" masuk dalam mata. my eye is itchy though....

ok..enough with the "selftalk". i need to go.

P/S: Abang, i'm sorry..

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

i'm angry to you.

here i am!

I'm sitting in a 16 degree temp room right now. Listening to Nelly - Just A Dream. What is on my mind??? Honestly, i kinda stuck. my mind is blocked. i cannot think. and why???? i do not know....honestly.

I'm angry to someone. very badly. i just don't know how to express my anger. but i'm surely, positively, i do not need an anger management counselling. maybe i should pull my blanket and shut my eyes for a few hours..